Bullying. The library incident that made me think.

Yesterday, I was working at the library, witnessed something that stirred a lot of feelings in me about bullying. Keen to hear your thoughts….

Bullying is such a serious issue, we need a cultural change in how we are allowed to treat people.

I was at the library on Friday (I like to work there every now and again) and shared a table with a few young people aged around 18. They were chatting away like best mates- even making plans for the weekend and laughing away. One of the girls excuses herself and goes to the toilet, suddenly the other girl turns to the guy and says “OMG she’s so f****ng annoying… Let’s just ignore her when she comes back!!” I was so shocked! The girl comes back and tries to chat with them again but they were trying to ignore her. I was weighing up whether I should have a quiet word with the girl who was being mean but someone told them to be quiet as it was a library and they were chatting so loudly. I also didn’t want to get involved with a relationship which I didn’t know much about and be out of context. But it really stayed with me. If you don’t like someone, there’s a polite way to let them know and let the relationship fade. It made me so sad. I hate seeing people being treated badly. Please be kind to each other… This isn’t a mushy plea – it’s about survival!

Unfortunately, I experienced it for many years whilst at school more of which can be read on my other blog. In my blog, I talk about THAT look. The sideways look like ‘Omg what a weirdo’, I hate that look.

When I go and talk in schools and I ask students a question and they give an enthusiastic answer and others do THAT look, I never let it slide. THAT look kills enthusiasm. It kills passion. It kills confidence. Let people be who they are and don’t belittle them, unfortunately some don’t recover. Sadly nothing will change, unless WE do and unless we COLLECTIVELY start to not accept those looks and that behaviour. I would bet £1,000 that if I told the mean girl in the library that what she’s doing is bullying, she’d be shocked. So few are aware of what they are doing. STOP.

I live tweeted this blog and here are some of your tweets:

@lotusflowerldn ; I was bullied in the workplace so this piece really resonates. The experiences don’t always build you up it’s true

@CleverJames ; Sucks. It happened to me at school too, but like to think I would feel the same even if it hadn’t. Just mean and immature

@_PC_ ; It happens at every age. Some people I know were not to friendly with a woman I knew who was ill. She hung herself.

@haaayles ; I once auditioned for the main part in the school play, got given THAT look and never tried out again…

@c_syal ; story of my life at school, massively knocked my confidence. Ironic how those bullies are now trying to be pally pally with me

Let us know your thoughts: @Melody_Hossaini / @inspirEngage
For enquiries about Melody’s speaking engagements for young people about bullying, email info@inspirEngage.com

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